


Unholy Feelings

by moricad



Series: Cross Your Heart [2]
Category: A3! (Video Game)
Genre: Anal Sex, Bad Decisions, Chigasaki Itaru has a Big Dick, Choking, Demon Sex, Developing Relationship, Kazunari Top, Lingerie, M/M, Supernatural Elements
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-18 18:02:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29613318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moricad/pseuds/moricad
Summary: It was December now. Kazunari wanted things to change.Almost two months after a mysterious visit in the night, Kazunari feels like he's going crazy. As his feelings, restlessness, and desires grow, he realizes his feelings for Itaru.Will Itaru reciprocate? And was the mysterious visit from Halloween night really just a dream?
Relationships: Miyoshi Kazunari/Chigasaki Itaru
Series: Cross Your Heart [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2175609
Comments: 4
Kudos: 13





	Unholy Feelings

**Author's Note:**

> _It was only supposed to be a one shot..._  
>  More Demon Itaru goods, enjoy! This is best read as part of the series.

Kazunari eyed Itaru from across the dining room table in the lounge. The winter wind sent chills through his spine as troupe members came in and out of the courtyard. Tsumugi worried about the fresh falling snow putting an early end to his camellias and violas. Taichi and Muku frantically looked for their winter mittens and hoped the snow would stick. Somewhere, Citron whispered to a co-conspirator about how exciting a prank it would be to leave Tsuzuru out in the snow tonight.

Snow was amazing, it was beautiful, and for the first time in his life Kazunari was completely uninterested. 

Itaru finally caught his eye as he looked up from his phone screen. “Kazunari, you’re not excited by the snow?” Curiosity marred his face.

Kazunari played with his bangs shyly. The oversized sleeves from his cabled knit sweater leaving his wrists and part of his forearms exposed as they gently fell down his arms. “Naaah, not really~ Maybe I will be if it sticks around.”

“Oh? It seems like prime time to attack Instablam to me.” Itaru curiously tilted his head as he tried to figure out what was up with his companion.

Kazunari met sparkling pink sapphires with his own peridots, trying to read Itaru’s expression. Ever since the morning after the Halloween party, things have been… odd between them.

November they occasionally still met with clumsy, awkward sex. Kazunari always wondered where the skill from that night went and Itaru still denied that he did anything to him and that it was all in his head. The longer this went on… Kazunari began to believe that maybe it really was. His self doubt in his memories started to get to him, making him a little bitter as the change of seasons set in.

Despite their frustrations with each other, their relationship revolved around casual sex, so they still made it work in the bedroom. It was just their day to day interactions that seemed to suffer. The longer things drew on though, the more Kazunari’s uncertain heart began to hurt.

Kazunari gently grasped the warm mug of hot cocoa in front of him and took a sip. “Hey, Itarun,” Kazunari whispered. It was December now. He wanted things to change.

“Hmm?” Itaru took the last drink of his soda and threw the can of cola at the trash can. Skillful as always, he missed spectacularly. “Aw shit.”

Kazunari giggled and grabbed the white sleeve of Itaru’s jacket before he could get up to leave. “Wait,” he pleaded, and Itaru sighed and sat back down with a bored look on his face.

“Alright, my aggro is on you.”

“... Let’s date.”

Itaru’s eyes widened in shock as he answered, “... Why?”

Kazunari’s eyes twinkled as he beamed at the shabby gamer before him and gave his honest response, “Because I legit can’t stop myself from thinking about you.”

Itaru’s eyes narrowed suspiciously. “You… don’t even know me.”

It was Kazunari’s turn to be surprised. Was that true? “I… I’ve seen a lot of different sides to Itarun, and I like them all. If none of those are his true self, I’m sure... I’d like that side too. I totes know I would.” 

Kazunari wasn’t a stranger to changing himself for others. Itaru obviously wasn’t a stranger to that as well. Although they were fundamentally different in their methods and reasons, there was a camaraderie there that Kazunari knew that they shared. Hopefully… Itaru would see this too and give him a chance to see beyond the defenses he had set up.

“Just because we sometimes hook up sometimes doesn’t mean I have feelings for you, you know…” Itaru’s hand nervously ran to his hair. He looked around for a distraction, but all the activity from a few minutes earlier seemed to have conveniently stilled and disappeared.

“True, but I legit have feelings for you,” Kazunari whispered carefully. “Just… give me a chance to know the real you. Then we can decide.”

Itaru sighed frustratingly, “You’re not going to let this go are you?”

“Please Itarun. I just want a chance to be with you.” Kazunari couldn’t help but notice the reluctance enveloping Itaru’s face and mannerisms as he considered Kazunari’s offer. Was he pushing too far? Backpedaling might be a good idea, he didn’t want to lose Itaru all together. “I mean, totes only if you’re comfo-”

“... Alright. Come to my room after midnight tonight.”

“It’ll totes be freezing! What if my feet stick to the stairs?!” Kazunari playfully whined to lighten the mood, but a genuine smile quickly grew on his lips.

Itaru laughed to try and dispel his own tension. “This is a one time party invite. You don’t show, I take it you’ve changed your mind.” Kazunari nodded firmly and happily sipped his cocoa, there was no way he was going to miss his chance.

Itaru said  _ after  _ midnight, not  _ at  _ midnight. Kazunari showed up half an hour past, hoping that was neither too late nor too soon. Honestly, he was really more worried about the latter of the two. It took all his restraint to wait as long as he did.

He didn’t bother changing. The thick, heavy sweater was one of the few items of clothing he had that could stand up to the freezing night temperatures without excessive layering. The grey joggers were already comfortable enough to sleep in if he stayed the night. All he had to do was slip on some slippers, his glasses, and grab his pillow as he slipped out towards his uncertain future.

It was a familiar scene as Itaru opened the door to room 103. “Ah, you were fast Kazunari,” the voice from almost two months ago echoed. A charming smile hid Itaru’s true feelings, whatever they may or may not be.

“Well, I totes didn’t want to keep you waiting for too long!” Kazunari blew Itaru a kiss on his way in, once again navigating the minefield that was Itaru’s floor as he went to toss his pillow up to the spare mattress. “I hope you don’t mind, but if things go well I’d like to stay over~” He happily hummed as he made his way back to Itaru’s couch.

“Sure, sure,” Itaru lazily began picking up clothes that littered the couch and tossed them into a seldom used laundry basket. “If you’ll still want to.”

Kazunari found a frown forming on his face.  _ Does Itarun really think I can’t understand the real him…?  _ Kazunari fought so hard to change who he was and find the balance between being himself and finding acceptance. If  _ anybody _ could understand what Itaru has gone through… it should be him, right?

He tightly gripped at his heart, palpitating unevenly at the thought of being rejected. The thought of these steadily growing feelings within him actually only being one-sided. The ever intrusive thoughts pushed their way into his head,  _ See Kazu? This is totes why you should learn how to fall in love before you start fucking somebody. _

_ Wait… love? Itarun was totes just a FWB! _ But then… why did he now want more?

“... Kazunari?” A quiet voice questioned from far away.

“Y-yeah Itarun?” Was he sweating? Kazunari felt warm and ran his hand under his bangs. He definitely was.

“You can sit down now, I’ll just be a minute.”

“R-right.” Kazunari slowly made his way to the couch and sat down. Itaru moved to the coffee table and began tidying it up, picking up wrappers and moving game cases into a tidy pile.  _ Nervous cleaner maybe…? _ Itaru cleaning in general was just too strange for Kazunari to stay locked away in his own thoughts.

“So… what’s all this about, Itarun?” Kazunari felt uncomfortable, as if the stars were out of alignment and the universe was suddenly tilted. He swore he was going to lose it if Itaru started sweeping up too.

“Ah…” Itaru went out of view and came back with two tall, purple pillar candles. They each had a curious circle carved into their sides, the area within indecipherable to Kazunari at this distance. He delicately set them on either side of the coffee table, the oblivious blonde centered between them. “You wanted to know the real me, right?”

“Yeah… but I was expecting something more serious than aromatherapy… or is this a wax kink kind of thing?” Kazunari blinked his eyes a few times and Itaru let out a chuckle.

“That’d make this a lot easier if it was.” Carefully, Itaru’s trembling hand lit each candle with a match. “You know… it wasn’t a dream.”

Kazunari felt his curiosity giving way to frustration, knowing exactly what was meant. “You mean… Halloween.”

“I do.” No apology followed. No explanation became clear.

“Then why did you lie to me?” Kazunari balled his fists against the leather sofa. “I’m fine with the kinky shit, y’know? But… why lie to me…? Why try to gaslight me?”

“You don’t understand.” Itaru looked at him sadly from the other side of the coffee table. “But you will soon.” Before Kazunari could form his hurt into words, Itaru was gone from his view and the lights were off.

The dim moonlight and the table with burning candles were all that could be seen. The scent was soft, similar to vanilla if Kazunari had to place a name to it. Itaru’s voice asked from the darkness if he was visible, and Kazunari replied with a curt no.

Suddenly the air in the room became thick and oppressive. Kazunari struggled to breathe as a faintly luminescent magenta mist filled the room. The golden flames of the candles danced deliciously in front of him. Then, before him in the mist, a pair of glowing magenta pink eyes made their way towards him through the darkness.

Instead of fear, confusion, or anger, all emotions slipped away as Kazunari felt a new elation growing within him. Glee at finally knowing that he wasn’t crazy. A growing excitement at the view he was now anticipating seeing.

The mysterious smog began to dissipate as Itaru stepped into the gentle glow of the candlelight. Kazunari tried to swallow but suddenly found his mouth a barren desert under the sun of Itaru’s mere presence. 

The horns were back, curving sensually from Itaru’s head. The reflection of the dancing flames danced beautifully off the smooth black and purple surface, the colors of the sunset reflecting and dancing their way on and off as Itaru slowly walked forward. 

A thick black collar adorned his neck, a bright purple heart shaped ring holding the leather together in the middle. Instead of a harness his chest was bare, a black leather corset instead adorning and cinching in his waist beautifully. Kazunari wanted to run his hands along the curve, but he found himself glued to the couch and Itaru was still so far away.

Low riding purple boxer briefs to match his horns adorned his crotch, his partial erection beginning to dangerously tent the fabric. The v of his hip bones ran deep, the low black band barely being high enough to cover the base of Itaru’s dick. A dry tongue left Kazunari’s mouth to run across sandy lips.

Was that the gentle clicking of heels he heard? It was too dark to see near the floor where the remaining haze had finally settled…

And suddenly, Itaru was standing before him, eyes swirling dangerously with the deep smoky purples that were covering the floor of the room. He slightly tilted his head back, a scowl on his face as he met Kazunari’s eyes.

“Itarun… you look so...” Kazunari found himself reaching for Itaru’s tightly cinched waist. Before contact was made, a hand with beautifully, deep painted nails reached out to grab his wrist.

Kazunari looked up at Itaru, his eyes still glowing bright with anger. “You  _ STILL _ don’t get it, do you?” A whip-like object shot out of the darkness and carefully wrapped itself around Kazunari’s neck.

Kazunari was shocked and instinctively reached up for his neck, but as he grabbed at the thin leathery cord he found that he could still breathe. The oddly warm rope slithered ever so slightly tighter around his neck as Kazunari saw it emerging from behind Itaru.

“I.. get it…” he coughed out, carefully sliding his fingers under the pointed tail just in case Itaru tightened it more. “You’re… not human… Itarun… but you still...”

As impossible as it was to believe, all the evidence was before him. No amount of sexy cosplay could explain away the moving tail… the thick fog… and Itaru’s perilously swirling eyes.

Loathing overcame his captor’s face as he growled, “I… still…?” The tail got tighter around Kazunari’s neck. Kazunari’s fingers began to ache.

“You… still… are Itarun…” Kazunari whispered as he removed his last line of defense from his neck. It was true, he was still Itaru, right? Then surely he’d be safe, despite the discomfort he was currently experiencing.

Itaru’s eyes widened and the treacherous purple fog dispersed both from his gaze and from the room. The contempt from his features was replaced by shock as his tail slowly began to unfurl from around its victim’s neck. Kazunari began breathing deeply in relief as he rubbed at the slight burning sensation left around his neck.

“A… are you stupid?” were the words that finally broke the silence, barely falling from stunned lips and shimmering, soft pink eyes.

Kazunari laughed shyly and raspily replied, “I’ve been called that a few times!” He smiled knowingly up at Itaru, hoping that he understood the feelings he wasn’t quite able to yet put into words. Itaru’s shock finally gave way to concern, then something indecipherable to the blonde in the dim candlelight.

“... You should leave.”

“... I won’t.”

The blanket of snow outside mirrored the silence that covered the dark room.

“I’m a demon. I can’t love you.” Harsh cutting words from a serious visage.

Was that a factual statement? The wheels in Kazunari’s head began spinning, looking for any evidence it could click into place. Itaru didn’t kill or mind wipe him when it probably was in his better interest to do either. He revealed his true self… just like Kazunari asked of him. And… I mean, they were totally still having totally great sex after the Halloween incident. That had to count for something.

Was Kazunari dumb? Probably. Was he horny? Most definitely. Did he care about Itaru? Although the precise details were still muddied and unclear within his heart, he did. All three of those things screamed at him to stay, despite whatever the feeble threads of common sense still remaining within him wanted. 

“I… don’t think I care. That doesn’t stop me from loving you.” The words fell so naturally from his lips and he tensed up at the realization. Was that what these deeply buried feelings were? The seeds of love had rooted and sprouted many weeks ago, just now beginning to bloom within his heart.

“You’re an idiot.” A look of pity briefly kissed Itaru’s face, before giving way to a devilish smirk. “You know, this is a terrible idea for you.”

“It'd be totes terrible to go on without you too,” Kazunari whispered to himself. His heart pounded as he reached out for Itaru in the darkness, hands finally landing on the tightly cinched waist and pulling the beautiful, otherworldly form ever closer.

“I mean… as long as you can continue to satisfy me, I guess I have no complaints.” Itaru shrugged as he straddled Kazunari’s lap. He grinned playfully as his tail swished behind him.

“So… like, you’ll totes be my boyfriend?” Kazunari gulped, that is what that meant, right? His hands pulled Itaru close, eagerly running his hands up and down Itaru’s bound waist.

“If that’s how you want to think of me, sure. I guess it’s more convenient to have a magically restocking minifridge nearby than to have to keep running out to the store.”

Kazunari smiled, pleased that after all of this he wasn’t rejected after all. Maybe he wasn’t reciprocated… but he wasn’t rejected. The blonde reached up into Itaru’s hair and gently pulled his face down to meet his own. “How about we feed you then?” he whispered, flushing at his own corny line.

Itaru chuckled, his kind smile betrayed by the magenta and gold flecks growing in his eyes. “I could go for a snack, sure.” Itaru threw his arms around Kazunari’s neck, allowing them to languidly hang off the back of the couch, as he came in for a kiss.

Suddenly, Kazunari’s painfully dry mouth was gush with saliva with the faintest contact with Itaru’s lips.  _ W...wha… _

Kazunari’s temporary surprise allowed Itaru the opportunity to lazily slip his tongue between parted lips. Kazunari moaned softly as the tongue sluggishly rubbed against own and playfully rolled through the saliva coating his mouth. His hands left Itaru’s waist to gently scratch at the bare of his back, desperate for more as the heat in his stomach grew.

Itaru slowly pulled away, licking his lips as his bored magenta eyes met Kazunari’s needy green ones. “Man, that didn’t take a lot, did it?” He smiled nonchalantly and ran a hand down to Kazunari’s joggers, slowly stroking his erection through the fabric.

Kazunari didn’t remember getting this hard? He threw his head back against the couch as he desperately tried to steady his breathing. It couldn’t be helped, Itaru’s technique was too good and he soon found himself rolling his hips and biting down on his lower lip to suppress a groan.

“Itarun… let me have you… please…” Kazunari whined, his entire body shivering in ecstasy so quickly.

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll get sucking in a minute.” Itaru leaned in and gently ran his tongue along Kazunari’s neck. “Let me get a little more of the appetizer first.”

“Itarun…” Kazunari whined in frustration, “No… let me fuck you… please…”

“Hmm?” Itaru pulled away and frowned in quiet contemplation. “I can’t transform back until I’m fed. Just how it works.”

Kazunari threw all the questions about to race through his mind directly into the  _ Deal With This Shit Later _ bin. Right now he just needed to fuck. “Please… I’d like to fuck you while you’re like this.” His hand ran up into Itaru’s hair and pulled, a low hiss coming from the recipient’s mouth.

“That’s dangerous for you.”

“It’ll still feed you... right?” His hand pulled at Itaru’s hair while the other clawed at his back. Itaru arched into him, his full erection now out and rubbing against his stomach. “That’s… what I’m for, right?”

Itaru’s eyes were now the familiar, comforting soft pink. Kazunari didn’t quite know what all these colors or movements behind the lenses meant, but the pink sapphire hue he always associated with a warm kindness.

“You don’t know what you’re asking for, Kazunari.”

“You can teach me later, Itarun.”

“Just this once,” Itaru relented and sighed in defeat. “Feel lucky, or maybe unlucky, that you’re so tasty… and I’m starving.”

Itaru leaned back in to gently kiss Kazunari, slightly sucking at his bottom lip as he pulled away. Flushed and ready, Kazunari guided Itaru’s hands to the side of the couch and gave him a quick spank to get him off his lap. Itaru smiled and rolled his eyes, getting on his knees on the couch. 

“You just want to see the tail better, huh?” Itaru laughed genuinely for the first time since this night started. Kazunari simply giggled in response.

Slowly, he pulled Itaru’s skimpy boxer briefs down to his knees, hands shaking and taking his time as he admired the perfect ass before him. He reached around to give Itaru’s large erection a few strokes, pleased to feel the slight moisture of precum on his tip as he twitched in his grasp.

“U-uh… lube... lube… where again…” Kazunari looked at the dark table, not seeing any familiar bottles in the candle light.

“Uhh, Kazunari. I’m fine when I’m in this form.” Itaru’s tail playfully nudged against Kazunari’s cheek as if to tease him.

“H-huh. A-are you sure? Seems like a bad look to me…” Kazunari delicately ran his finger around Itaru’s entrance before questionably pressing in. He found surprisingly little resistance? He winced slightly as he slipped a second finger in and sighed in relief as he easily curled his fingers against Itaru’s walls.

Itaru chuckled lightly, his tail pressing back against Kazunari’s cheek. “Semen demon, remember? I have all sorts of sweet hidden abilities you don’t know about.”

Kazunari chuckled awkwardly, “Right, right. It’s easy to forget about- Ow!” Itaru’s tail flicked him against the forehead as if he was about to utter the stupidest thing of this evening. It would definitely have been in the running. Kazunari grumbled and used his spare hand to grab the bothersome pest.

“Hhhh?!” Itaru’s back arched and shoulders flushed as Kazunari tugged on the offending appendage. 

“... Special feature?” Kazunari grinned mischievously as he slid his fingers out of Itarun and dropped his own bottoms to his knees.

“I… don’t remember that being in the manual…” Itaru let out a low-rolling moan as Kazunari wrapped the irksome tail a few times around his hand and gave it another tug. Itaru’s ass moved back to brush against his cock, causing Kazunari to smile.  _ This _ was definitely the Itaru that he knew in bed from these past few months. The devilish confidence and languorous attitude gone, replaced by a bashful, needy, and impatient body shaking in anticipation for his dick.

Kazunari carefully lined himself up with Itaru’s entrance and slowly slid in. Itaru’s ass always felt great on his dick… but something was different as he bottomed out inside of him. Kazunari’s arms shook as he desperately grasped at Itaru’s corseted waist, nails finally digging in like claws at his hips to find a steady composure.

He hadn’t even started thrusting yet, but it felt like Itaru’s walls were already wrapping and squeezing him, trying to pump him dry. Kazunari slowly drew out, thinking maybe it was too much stimulation too quickly, but found himself plunging his cock back in and setting a desperate pace.

“I… Itarun… wha…” Kazunari could no longer compose words other than desperate pleas of Itaru’s name between his dire, needy moans. The tail still caught in his hand got tugged with each rough thrust, with each loud clap of skin. Itaru moaned and shook beneath him, his increasingly frequent cries like a siren song ever driving Kazunari’s hips forward. 

Unable to stop or slow his pace, it wasn’t long before Kazunari let out a desperate wail as he pumped his way through a powerful orgasm. The roll of his hips slowed and he vaguely felt himself begin to slip out of Itaru as his vision began to fade to black.  
  


Kazunari woke up in a familiar cold sweat, with an unfamiliar weight on his chest. Panicked, he looked for his glasses, only to see a familiar blur on the nearby coffee table. Just within his reach, he managed to place them on his face.

His heartbeat steadied as he took in his surroundings. He was on Itaru’s couch, where he hazily remembered passing out last night. The weight was just Itaru, peacefully sleeping on top of him. Bangs tied up, body draped in an oversized soft yellow t-shirt and flannel pajama pants, he was definitely no longer the supernatural incubus from last night. 

A light snoring sound steadily helped Kazunari’s heartbeat find its steady rhythm again, and he allowed himself to comfortably sink back into the cushions below him. Idly, he pet Itaru’s hair and tried to figure out what he threw out in the trashcan of his mind last night.

Something about Itaru’s demon form being a bad idea. That’s probably related to him passing out and his overbearing exhaustion. Man though, that felt _ scary _ good. Kazunari felt heat trying to build in his gut just at the memory, so he quickly quashed that and moved on.

There was something about there being rules to the whole demon thing… but there was no use in wondering about what he didn’t know. He didn’t try to listen to Itaru at all on this one.

Kazunari admitted to himself and his partner that… he loved him. Oh, that was the real scary bit. He put that one back in the bin for now.

Then finally… Itaru said that he couldn’t love him back. Kazunari couldn’t help but wonder if that was a demon thing. Itaru had emotions. He laughed, he got frustrated and confused… he’s been terribly shy at times. He has addictions to video games… and addictions are fueled by serotonin and the payoff of potential joy. If he could feel those, why couldn’t he feel love? Or was there something else at play here?

Kazunari sighed and gently rubbed Itaru’s pink cheek with his thumb. So if they’re dating does that mean they’re exclusive now? Kazunari would like them to be but… was that even possible for a demon? He worried if he’d be pushing unfair standards on Itaru if he asked for that.

The weight in his lap finally began to rouse. Soon, squinty pink eyes stared up at him, widening into surprise. “You’re… okay?” A curious question from a voice desperately trying to throw off sleep.

“Y… yeah I guess so.” Kazunari smiled awkwardly and Itaru smiled back. The blonde sighed, “We… need to talk, don’t we?” If he didn’t ask, he’d be stressing over it all day.

“Yeah, obviously. That was really dangerous, you know.” Despite the stern words, Itaru continued to smile up at him, eyes happily twinkling. “Thank you,” he whispered from Kazunari’s chest.

Kazunari tilted his head in confusion. He didn’t understand what he could have done.

“You know. For passing the CHA-Persuasion check.” Itaru sighed as Kazunari’s face remained unchanging. “For wanting to see the real me, and accepting it. I may not be able to love you back… but I do feel a little less lonely now.”

Kazunari’s lips parted in surprise as Itaru yawned and pulled a throw blanket up to his neck, nestling his way back to sleep. Whatever risks there were for Kazunari or whatever trouble he had gotten himself into, hearing those words made it all seem worth it.

It was easy to believe that when the consequences were still unknown. But for now, Kazunari allowed his eyelashes to flutter shut as he held Itaru close to his chest, hoping to rejoin him in a blissful, much needed sleep.


End file.
